The Twenty Third Channel

"The TV is my shepherd, I shall not want.
It makes me lie down on the sofa
It leads me away from the faith
It destroys my soul
It leads me in the paths of sex and violence
For the sponsors’ sake.
Yea though I walk in the shadow of my responsibilities
There will be no interruption
For the TV is with me,
Its cable and remote controlThey comfort me.
It prepares a commercial before meIn the presence of my worldliness.
It anoints my head with humanism and consumerism.
My covetousness runneth over.
Surely laziness and ignorance
Shall follow me all the days of my life
And I shall dwell in the house
Watching TV forever."