Thabiti Anyabwile has a post 'What A Husband Must Be' in which he outlines & gives some thoughts from a Voddie Baucham sermon called "What He Must Be (Marriage by Design)".
The main points of how a husband must lead are:
1. Must lead in love.
2. Must lead in the word.
3. Must lead in righteousness.
4. Must lead in selflessness.
5. Must lead in intimacy.
I encourage you to read the full post and these points outlined in more detail.